And maybe someday those old words won't be so pointy. I will let it go because holding onto it keeps me below the bar. Sometimes it's just not worth it. Don't be sharp just because you broke it, why make it hurt more for me?

All I know is that I've got stability of the most literal type in the world.

Xanga is too much drama.

I guess I should just learn not to trust people.

Forever is a word that is given out like candy. Don't use it unless if you really mean it. To me, it's stronger than love.

But it's okay because I've got sunshine in a glass. Snowflakes on my tongue. Ink on paper.

Au Revoir

Our relationship will never ever change. You just cut me too deep. We both wear masks and pretend to be smiling and friendly, but the fact is, it's easier being friends with you than it is to not be. I don't know if that's right, or wrong. It is what it is and it won't ever change.

Woah... I pretty much miss you right now and I don't know why. You're so easy to talk to and I want this to go somewhere.

Our past is short but intense. I don't want to lose you, but I feel like I am. I don't want to say anything because I think you'll feel I'm overreacting. I miss what used to be, but I knew that was going to go away. I just don't want you to think that means our relationship has to change. No matter how few our visits, or how busy our scedules, you'll always be my best friend. I really hope you feel the same way.

You're always going to be the one to make me laugh the most. I feel like ever since we've known each other our relationship has never changed. That's comfortable. I want to let you know how much I appreciate it. We're in the same situation, just miles appart. I love you!

Wooooooooow today's gone so fast I can barely see myself. I'm all blurry.

The most hilarious part of today was definitely in the car with Sean, Andrew, and Sam after school before jazz choir. We went to taco bell. Put the emphasis on taco not bell. Andrew got so totally busted for trying to get soda instead of water. The guy totally flipped out on him. It was a little ridiculous. The guy seriously ripped it from his hands and then threw it in the trash can and it sloshed all over the place. And we peeled out of the parking lot.

Jazz choir was awesome.

Went to the volley ball game with Dani after. And I didn't have a pencil so I couldn't do my homework. But hoosha Knights won. I definitely have to figure out a way to get home after jazz choir. I just did AAT homework and notes for history. I still have to write a thesis and do two PSD analysis...es... if I don't take a break my brain will explode.

Now I need to go be productive. Later.

Chin up

I love that last one. I was looking at it and I was thinking "pft. Beautifully broken. That's so emo" then I really thought about it. I was thinking about how something could be broken down. Sometimes things just shatter and they completely are destroyed forever. But broken... broken is something different. Something could be broken in just a way that it can be put back together, but in a new and better way. Beautifully broken. Maybe not broken intentionally. But beautifully broken.

Today was =\

The morning was cool. I was really tired though. We (the marching band kids) got to get out of the first four periods and to preform at Frederick. It was partly annoying because I don't like to miss class, and partly amazing because I got to see all of my marching band buddies that I never see otherwise. I totally slept on the bus from North to Central. Changing was annoying. But then again, it always is. It's just even more so when you're being rushed. Frederick was partly tiring. Everyone was getting REALLY excited though, which is always nice to see.

Why are the seniors so cool?

Then lunch... Everyone was surprised at my coming back. And we talked about how Tyler's stupid because he hasn't ASKED THE GIRL TO HOMECOMING AND WE KNOW SHE'LL SAY YES BUT HE'S SO STUPID. Every day I get some sort of a love life pep talk about how "guys are stupid and need things to be obvious". Also, every day we come back onto the same awkward topic. Aaron and I always just do the little buzzer thing.

Biology was a lot better than I thought it'd be. But Jake was being annoying (opa, what's new?) and I was already in a fragile state (for some reason. I don't really know why...) and that just made it worse. Because he was being a jackass, really.

PE- Bike lab. Was really out of it, but got a requirement done. Not in the usual 20 minutes though. LOST MY AMAZING EARRINGS. That really made me upset.

Band- ugh. Peter was being stupid and it just sent me through the roof. And Reed was being mean to me and I didn't appreciate it. Blah.

But! Ryan and Richie cheered me up after school. It's so exciting to see them at North. Ryan was talking in his voices and making me laugh and it totally cheered me up. I miss my Ry Ry. He totally got me through. Everything. I don't know what I would have done last year with out him. The two of them came to French club with me for a little while. Then they went off to play practice. French club was good though. Food. Games. Officer election. I would, but yes... Jazz choir will completely interfere second semester.

Soccer games. Pretty hilarious. Met a lot of new people. It's amazing how many people I don't know. Tednes has an evil twin. They sound exactly the like, are the same height and weight, and have the same hair. It's so creepy. I hate it. Except, Jack is way more... vulgar than Tednes will ever be. He talked to Kerwin on the phone and was... just... really inappropriate. Then Brad was trying to convert me, but it didn't work. Convert me to what, I don't know, but he was stroking me, so I didn't want to be converted.

Homework and dinner. And myspace. That's my day. Gonna get up early tomorrow and shower and blow dry and then I'll be ready to jam it out. Pep rally! Exciting.